I take the bike out, it rains: the story of my life.

No, really. I opted not to ride my bike from the south campus parking lot because the forecast predicted rain...and lots of it. ::shakes fist at Owen:: I got to school with enough time to study before my test, which as noted yesterday I was determined to do well on despite my odds (see that's ironic because the test was on statistics. okay, so maybe it's not the same as probability). Anyway, when I get there, the sun is out, so I figure I'll drive halfway on campus and walk a bit. I toted the umbrella just in case.

So I take my test, which isn't so bad. The breakfast burrito (read: mistake) I had for breakfast decided mid-test to fuck me up, though. So what if I got two of the three bonus questions wrong because I didn't have time to read them? Heh. I dashed to a secret place that I'm not afraid of using the bathroom in an emergency and then, having still another 40 minutes worth of break, and with a sky of sunshine, I got out the bike. I rode for about 25 minutes before returning to class. And as I did so, the rain began.
And so did our extended break! Because Sue wanted to get our tests graded, we got an extra 30 minutes (my sympathies to Ryan who had to sit and grade with her). Despite the rain, I went back out. And lo and behold: the rain was gone. This time, though, I had a destination. I'm in love with the speed tracker sign, because it measures my speed on a bike. Problem is, it's atop a slight incline, so my unskilled ass can't usually get it to read anything over 8 or 9. (My first picture is clearer, but it's of an 8. I went back, prepped and made 11.) It's quite difficult when cars screw it all up.
Aaaand at that point guess what happened. Yep, rain. Again. But I was just happy to get my picture. Next time, I'll get a 12. (I'm so laaaame!)

As you might be able to tell, my day wasn't very interesting. I took that test and got the highest score in the class. I rode my bike back to my car (at which point it started raining, mind you). I went shopping (for my dad, brother, and I got me two items of clothing as well). Have I mentioned yet that I hate shopping? I came home and got McDonald's for my mom who was having a craving (it cost her a McChicken sandwich, more commonly known as "a dollar"). I fucked around online for apparently a good hour (what the hell do I do on this thing?), napped for a whole hour (a habit I seriously need to reconsider), then fucked around online for a bunch more hours while pretending to write a paper. Okay, that's not entirely true. I submitted one of my papers and started the next, so some progress was made.

This is the single most boring blog I've ever written. I made a new friend, but I'm too tired to even talk about him.

I do want to include this picture, though. I've been meaning to take it for a while now, and after I did, it was no longer fountainesque. They either ran out of water or figured out how to turn it off. I swear this thing had been going for weeks. SUNY Stony Brook ftw!

training, ipod failure and statistics

What do they all have in common, you ask? My day. I spent three hours at work today talking. For three straight hours I tried to explain a majority of what I do in a week to a girl who could easily become office manager were she not an FIT student looking to get into fashion. Devyn, cutest of cute, a mere twenty-ish (and by 'ish' I mean 'or younger') can pick up and do and understand almost anything. She reminds me a lot of me at that age. I remember working at Russel Plastics and asking question after question so I could do my job "right." I was a perfectionist, and I was good. These days, I'm happy just to leave the office.

I haven't been able to get past lesson two of French by podcast (but I can understand Chris when he refers to a direction or says 'girlfriend' now), and as of today it is even more difficult. The error I am currently receiving, even after rebooting, is "FireWire connections are not supported. To transfer songs, connect the USB cable provided. Press Center to dismiss." I must have pressed Center 3 hundred million times to no avail. After a reboot, I get about twelve seconds to decide what I want to listen to. Queen of patience that I am, I opted for good ol' fashioned radio instead.

I'm discovering my own interests what with all the podcasts I've been listening to. I like science, I like health; however, I appear to be bored (or easily distracted) when listening to world relations. I am not happy about this fact. I want to be interested, so I don't see why I can't force myself to be, but it certainly takes extra concentration, which I don't often have.

Statistics. Oh annoying research-oriented pathetic statistics. I am so very banking on being able to drop tomorrow's test. But I did study my heart out for two hours and I will certainly cram for another hour prior to the exam. I just... I mean... ok, ready? Between-subject designs with more than two levels of the independent variable or more than one independent variable use independent ANOVAs for their inferential statistics. I have no idea what that means, but that is only one example of what I need to know. Within-subject designs with one independent variable having two levels gets a paired t-test. I'm not even sure that's right, I'm just hoping it is.

So speaking of stats and research and my class, here is my daily photo as it describes what's been most on my mind as well as agenda:

Looks like fun, yeah?

Take 2

Well, then. After rashly deleting my initial blog I have decided I'd rather continue with the picture-a-day...until, of course, I skip too many days for me to feel like I've been able to maintain my new attempt at blogging. I'll decide what to do with everything I'd created if and when that time comes to pass.

Today was not as bad an emotional day. I got a little glum over the Results paper I have to write for my Research & Writing class, but I stayed tough. I did a lot of work tonight on it, but have little to show save for a shaky table, but progress is progress nonetheless.

Mike told me I overreacted over something earlier, and he was right, but I angrily chose to disengage myself from the conversation instead of dealing with it. I imagine I should apologize. Perhaps I will do that following this post.

I took two pictures today, of two of the biggest things in my life (during the week anyway, as Chris battles with school for the top slot): school and work. Rather than choose between the two, I thought I would just post both.

This is the Javits Lecture Center at school. It's an awkwardly designed building, diamond in shape with confusing corridors leading to all 10 or so classrooms it contains. The array of flora is new to the recently renovated building and it has certainly come a long way since my first days at SBU. My only gripe with it is the heightened level of air conditioning blasting throughout unnecessarily. Bring a sweatshirt or suffer the consequences!

Secondly, this is Taylor. She is the daughter of the owner of the practice I work for. She's a sweetheart, but a spoiled one (what only child isn't?). She's just another north shore east coast Long Island girl in the making though -- her manicure/pedicure was the news of the day, in not her favorite color, purple, but pink-to match her outfit. Still, the girl is adorable:

I wrote a letter for work today that was "perfect" on the first draft. I think it was the first time ever something I had produced was not requested to be modified. I thank the law firm for that. As well as my NYT crossword subscription. I keep meaning to tell Barbara I still use it. I will try to do so this weekend when I drop by to give her some things.

In other news, I'm happy for Jo, who got herself a new job today, even if it is in the Bronx. So long as she's happier there, I've no beef with who her employer is.

I truly wish I didn't generalize my own actions as part of a greater picture all the time. There's something to be said for progress with oneself, but I have a difficult time determining when it's okay to "screw up." Obviously, no one is perfect, and things can't always run smoothly. But how often is too often? How much is too much? How long is too long? I imagine I will have a difficult time sleeping this evening. I am not a fan of doing things in complicated ways, but it appears without utmost constraint, sometimes it is impossible for me not to. I fear the consequences of my own actions, and although I will try to keep myself calm in their respect, there will likely always be a part of me that "worries." I will summon my positive thinking and try to hold it near. I feel like I may have gone from uber-negative to uber-positive and have now landed somewhere in the middle. I'd like to find out how to get back to uber-positive, because everything went quite well and I felt the happiest when it was the reining mindset. It must be possible if I was there once. Right?

a picture a day...

(originally written 6/23/08)

...keeps the Alzheimer's away? Chris mentioned something about taking a picture per day of, well, life, and I think it's a great idea. So, hiding in this blog I imagine no one will find, I shall do just that. However, today I neglected to take a picture. So I'm going to start this picture-blog with me, now. I'm taking a picture of my typing these exact words. (Please note: I'm on the old Dell. Not the new one. It appears I missed it. Less two keys and all.)

Very little thoughts accompany me today. I have been fighting with myself over things like wanting Chris to want me to be around more (which is a little silly, really) and time management and wanting to be emo (which I don't, but my natural emotions seem to keep edging toward). I've done an okay job thus far. I 86ed gchat for the time being and logged off of Facebook chat. I believe he loves me. I believe his past loves (and this dates back to high school, apparently) are not really threats. Still, I can't help but think about them. Security, could you swing by and save me? Thanks.

Off to do some clean-up stuff for the eve and then head to bed.

But first...picture #1: