it's been a long day, always, ain't that right?

Thank you, Rob Thomas, for allowing me not to think too hard for a blog title today. The good news: I'm writing two consecutive days in a row. The bad news: I've little to say.

Worked 9-2. It went...exceptionally smoothly. Anyone I asked for something, they said "sure, no problem," and did it. It was nice not to have to complain about how ridiculously retarded some people are.

Got home 'round 3:15. Read a few emails only to fully realize Chris & my apartment hunting is actually Chris's apartment hunting. It's something I knew but hoped wouldn't actually be the case. Whatever, it is, and I've opted to go numb in the face of it. I can only be thankful he was at least attempting to find a place semi-accommodative to my desires. Every once in a while I toss around the idea of looking some places up and trying to book appointments, but really this isn't about me, and it's best I just leave it alone.

I bike rode out the frustration over the situation, to Blockbuster to return Juno. I found a few coke caps. O glorious day. I decided to snap this photo while I was out, because it reminded me of the first Chris. The one I think might be named Chris Barton, but then again probably isn't. Mom and I call him Chris Carni, because that's what he was. The carni that I lost my virginity to and wanted to get married when I was 18. I wonder what life would be like if I went ahead with all of that marriage and babies thing.

Anyway, for everyone's information, "never date a ride guy." Chris wasn't a ride guy. I wonder whatever happened to him. Anyway, here is what a carnival looks like four days before it's set to "open."

I got home, napped, then had some pretzels, cheese & crackers and raw cauliflower and carrots for dinner. Then I worked on my paper due at the end of the week. Then I cleaned up some things around my room.

Now, I write this. Following this, I will read some news and likely pass out in the process.

Just as well, I'm not all that 'uppity' today anyway. My paper would refer to it as 'extroverted.'

More tomorrow (I hope). Now that is sure to be a real "long day."

1am Addendum: deleted because I probably already fucked up, and doing so even more would just make it worse.

P.S. Sean? How do I change the time on this website to reflect the actual time I write these damn blogs? Any ideas?

Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday

I really need to make more of an effort to write on nights Chris is here. In any event, I suppose it's okay I just continue to catch myself up, so long as I just take a picture every day. Anyway, recap:

Thursday (3rd of July): I lost my Wiiginirty. First, though, I went to school for two hours. Interestingly enough, I get a phone call 15 minutes after class was supposed to start...from the teacher...who just woke up. It was cute. I announced that class would start an hour late, and went off on an unexpected (but pleasurable) bike ride. Where did I go? Past the hospital, to the Chapin Apartments. Why? Because they're pretty and they make me miss having an apartment. Wanna see? Here ya go!

I also mourned the loss of a good machine that morning. The (Coke product) Dasani machine moved out, and the new Pepsi machine moved in. I mourn not because I am an avid Coca-Cola fan, but because I am a coke points fan. Chris & I began collecting coke product caps (and boxes for the 12-packs). Days later, Pepsi moved into SBU. Murphy, get back in your cage.

Oh and also, to the three or four people that read this, if you could either save your coke codes or email them to me (with product type -- i.e. diet coke, orange fanta, etc.), that'd be fan-freakin'-tastic.

(P.S. this picture is inside the Javits Lecture Center).

After class and a brief convo with new Ryan (there's emo Ryan, CA Ryan and new Ryan, for those of you keeping score at home), wherein he let me borrow I Am America and So Can You, I headed to the ENT/Audiologist's office to see if I could find out more about my flaccid eardrum and see if it was linked to the excruciating pain I suffer through when flying on an airplane. First, I get "rejected" at registration. Then the insurance CSR I call can't find the office I'm at in their system. After all was said & done, the visit will very likely not get paid for. Yes, I am eligible and yes, the doctor is in network. But without a real complaint (read: ICD-9 or diagnosis (Dx) code), Aetna "screw 'em if you can find a way to" will likely deny me. The good news, however, was that I did not need to see the ENT. I never made it past my audiology portion; Kristi says I'm just fine. I even have a printout of some lines to prove it.

Oh, and as I left the office, this was just outside the parking lot -- a lake and a fountain. Just...mid-industrial park. Freakin' north shore east end long islanders.

I ran around doing errands the remainder of Thursday afternoon. Did some homework, ran to the supermarket and bank, stuff like that. 'Round 7 or so Rob came over and the losing of the Wiiginirty took place, which was fucking awesome. We drank rum & cokes, made fun of each other and played every Wii Sport (and then some Mario Kart). In order to avoid any potential awkward, he left a decent portion of time before Chris came over. And why I didn't mention that Rob was there, I don't know. I don't wish I were still with Rob; I don't even see him as potential to ever be with again (not that I have any plans on being in any other relationships, like, ever). And it's not even like I think Chris would be upset that we hung out. I don't know, the fact that there's even a hesitation there means it needs to be further explored in my head and dealt with accordingly. The next time we get together, I will make sure to revise how I handle it.

So yeah, ultimately Chris came over and we had coffee and sat and talked and it was really nice. Like, really really nice. Maybe I'm making a big thing out of nothing, but I enjoyed that portion of my evening more than I did the four hours of Wii-ing. The morning was fast approaching though, so we turned in shortly thereafter.

Friday (4th of July): I made some pancakes for breakfast. We putzed around for a little while, then watched a romantic comedy (barf!) that I rented mostly for the music portion (Music & Lyrics). Immediately following we gathered our sleepover stuffs, contributions to the cook out (as Anne Cooper would call it; not BBQ), and headed to Owen's. Great food was served. Good drinks. Tons of people that didn't know one another. Some drizzling of rain. I eventually whined and complained enough that a car of us drove over to N. Ocean/495 to catch some of the Bald Hill fireworks from afar. They were pretty. Invaded some by traffic and just...stuff, so next year I would really like to go to a show of some kind, but we'll see how life goes. There was a bit of an argument in the car on the way there though that merited some internet searching the next day on Chris & my behalf (mostly Chris's; I was there for moral support and to take a picture of it). The argument was open-window drag vs. air conditioning in cars. I will discuss the outcome in the Saturday portion.

So when we returned I went antisocial on everyone who remained. I guess it was a combination of the car ride and the sobriety and the long day(s) (or maybe those are just excuses), but I opted not to hang out outside with the "group" around the fire pit. Instead, I responded to a few texts, had a peanut butter brownie (yum, by the way!) and tried to re-hydrate. When I did go outside for a (very) short while, I was eaten alive by bugs, and in the ten minutes I was out there, I wound up with a very swollen thumb. Bug bite of sorts. I retreated to the house, and Anne Cooper eventually joined me and kept me company. I iced the finger and went back to drinking wine, at a pace I should have probably started with. The girl talk was nice though.

We crashed there, slightly cramped but managed on a twin mattress they dragged into the basement living room after hanging out with Owen and Anne Cooper for a little while after the party dissipated. More good conversation. I think I really like those. I knocked myself out with a little Benedryl so my finger wouldn't bother me all night, so the getting to sleep part was quite simple.

Saturday (5th of July): when we awoke pancakes & bacon were awaiting us. We cleaned up the bed, ate for a bit, then when the conversation turned to programming language, I opted to hit the shower. I cleaned up our things after cleaning myself, mostly because I was groggy and not much of a conversationalist. I think I also get uncomfortable with strangers after a certain period of time. I should look into that. In any event, Chris showered, Anne Cooper left, we chatted with the remaining housemates for a few, but then headed off, for party/cook out number two of the long weekend.

Sometime just before 1pm-ish we got to my job, in the same town as Owen's, where my bike was being stored for the weekend (so that we could bring another and ride together). We geared up and headed out to Miller Place from Stony Brook, a 10-mile ride. We went by way of Rt 347, which was either genius or completely retarded. It took a few intersections to get the hang of it, but we managed and made it in one piece. My father made his typical "you rode bikes here?" negative comment, which we politely ignored and offered out his Father's Day present(s) and Kellen's birthday gifts. Snacks, more barbecuing, mojitios (oh yeah!) and playing with my brother = good time. Chris took his turn at semi-antisocial, but it was only fair and completely understandable. He played ball with Kellen & myself for a few minutes as well, and made it super-fun, as lame as that sounds. I forgot to take pictures.

We rode back after dessert, which was good because I felt like a whale by that point. I was also having some cheese-related stomach pain which was lovely to ride with. But it was a fairly quick trip and we were home by dark. I continued to ice the finger as it was still swollen (I have a picture of this, but it's on my phone, and I have absolutely no idea how to get the phone pictures onto the computer--it's that bad). We decided to run to Blockbuster and grab my July free rental. I got heated when some guy screamed out of his window because I almost made the wrong turn but then caught it and stayed on the road. He was so busy trying to race past me, it annoyed him when I decided to go straight again. This was cause to generalize that I am, in fact, a horrible driver and worse: a cunt. He'll likely wrap his gas-guzzling truck around a pole someday, though, so with a little help from the Chris-calming-department and my belief in karma, I was only upset for 5 minutes. We picked out Juno for the watching. I ... can't say I recommend it, but it was certainly an interesting and entertaining flick. And, as Chris mentioned, it sparked thought and (yet more awesome) conversation, so it couldn't have been bad.

Then, onto the drag vs. A/C question. It was time to look it up.

The result? Under 45 mph: windows open. 45-60 mph: gray area. 60+: windows up, A/C on.

And also: it doesn't matter the level the fan is on, A/C is A/C no matter. However, it's best to use the cabin air recirculated than it is to continue to pull air in from outside of the car.

That, my friends, is the verdict. I will not say who is right and who is wrong, because no one predicted that speed made the difference.

(And no, Mac isn't paying me to put a MacBook Pro on my blog site. But they should.)

Sunday (6th of July): Lazy start to the day, but up & out before noon nonetheless. We walked to the bagel store/deli for bacon/1egg/cheese on wheat with a shared side of hashbrowns, then around Lindenhurst for the next two hours. Good walk. Seriously. After we got home, we showered, took a nap, then ran out for corn & pasta. We came back, chopped a ton of veggies, fired up the grill and cooked out yet again. We made garlic & pepper chicken, sausage, mixed veggies (broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, red peppers) and corn cobs on the grill. We also heated up another red pepper and made some pasta for which to add most of the sausage to. Our timing was kinda crappy, but everything was delicious, and I now have an abundance of veggies as well as a blend of sausage, peppers and pasta for lunch(es) this week. Following that, my mom & I roasted marshmallows (Chris had one or two, but then went in to clean up the dishes--ain't he grand????) and I then cleaned up the little that was left and we went upstairs to spend our quality together-but-apart time. [What that means: Chris plays WoW and I do homework--it's a Sunday night routine unless we have something else going on.]

He left 'round midnight and I have spent a majority of the past two hours writing this. I also took a few Scrabble turns and imported my pictures. Oh! Speaking of -- since I don't have any from today, per se, I am going to use one that's technically from 7/6, but only because it was taken after 12am last night.

And Chris, if & when you read this, if you hate that I posted this, tell me & I will exchange it for a blurrier/blocked photo.

The quick story: I was complaining how much my thumb hurt (by the way, the swelling has gone down immensely and I can finally bend it at the knuckle again), so Chris...how do I put this? Well, he sucked my thumb. Only for a minute, but it was adorable and weird but adorable (though weird), but really adorable, and he really wouldn't let me get a picture of it. However, somehow I managed blur.

My favorite, best, adorable, most loved, most loving boyfriend:




I love him so much.

ketchup

Or, rather, catch-up. I was so tired last night I couldn't post a second blog for the "day" and I feel as though I may have begun to fail at this picture-a-day thing. However, all hope is not lost. I am back, and I can continue. Unfortunately, it's 1:30 in the morning now, a time I was hoping would be earlier, but mundane tasks took entirely too long. Seems as though my entire day has been themed as such. I spent extra time at work (a very long, grueling 8.5 hours, which I am no longer used to as a full day) and got home too late for anything really productive. I read some for school and did little things like clean up my room and check my schedule for next semester to see if I could be an RA, but overall? I feel kinda like I just woke up for the day.

Mind you, today was a late day. I am extremely thankful for Joana's text message as it woke me up...25 minutes late. I luckily was only 10 minutes late to work, which no one was around to notice, and I stayed an extra 15 minutes after I "clocked out" to morally make up for it without displaying my late start time. But I didn't get to shower (ew!) and after the long workday, I was shot.

An interesting thing happened today. Not to me, but to a friend of mine, who I am calling Maria for the sake of protecting those that would not be thrilled to have their lives discussed in a public Linda-blog. I'd like to sit here and type the story and how I feel about it (which is really the reason I'm even mentioning it), but it's late, and I've class at 9, and I will certainly still want to discuss this on the morrow. So, be teased, and come back to read wtf got me so riled up.

Oh, and also? Yesterday & today pictures. First, of the Throggs Neck Bridge, which I have never seen on a Tuesday morning (for yesterday). And second, my cat. Because she puked (again) today and ate the ends of the ribbon on my dad's belated Father's Day gift. She was obviously not on my good list today. Unfortunately, my day was so uneventful she's also the only thing worth taking a picture of.

Ciao for now. (P.S. -- added pictures to my last post!)

I don't give up (blogs) quite that quickly...

Just because I took a four-day hiatus does not mean I'm done after a mere three days. It means I was tied up (ahem, ahem) with other things. For one, spent Friday afternoon at the Mets v. Yankees makeup game (yes, the one they got totally slaughtered at). Interesting things that happened: 1) a squirrel found its way onto the field, ran through the outfield and proceeded to freak out in attempting to find its way out via the warning track; 2) The guy shown here hopped onto the field and made it about that far before getting tackled by the NYPD at full-speed. They then piled on top of him to arrest him. I particularly like this picture because the person clapping has "trapped" Justin Christian between their hands. Despite the score and the price of the tickets (Chris shelled out; I'm still feeling guilty), it was a fun time, and we stayed 'til the [absolute] bitter end.

Following the game, we rushed around to get to Overlook Beach to see Big Shot play, as this would be my third year there. Definitely a Long Island thing though, this Billy Joel cover band. Hey, it's a good time, and really I just prefer to hang out at the beach on warm summer nights with good people while what is ostensibly (*wink*) Billy Joel blares from beyond. It's nice to see some people I don't often get the chance to. Namely, (L to R) Steve, Billy, Megan, Rena & Tom. Dan & Amy were MIA at that point, but they returned shortly therafter. The whole event cost me a soda at 7-11 (to add to the rum I already have a gigundo bottle of in my house) and gas to & from. Of course, Chris & I had to stop at a diner on the way home for coffee and a shared meal, but I think I'm going to steer us away from those things (like the 1am nachos & beer we had Saturday night). There's a myriad of reasons to lay off the crappy food and the late-night snacking, so the new plan is to do just that. Not that I really want to lose any more weight, but whatever will be, will be.

Saturday consisted of good (but incredibly expensive) food in NYC and Eddie Izzard. *swoon* Obviously, there were late-night nachos and two-fers from Applebee's following our train ride home. Two semi-busy but decent days. I had a lot of fun. Better late than never picture(s): Rain. Sunshine-infested beautiful rain.And of course, EI's marquee, which is way more awesome than any picture I managed to almost get of him on stage.

Sunday was half of a wasted day (and by 'wasted' I mean slept away; not necessarily a poor use of time), a long walk around Lindenhurst/N. Amityville and a delicious BBQ at a former co-worker's house. It ended a little late and a little poorly, but hey-maybe I needed to hear some of the things I did. I thoroughly enjoyed about 90% of my three-day weekend, and to be perfectly honest I'm okay with having a semi-crappy 10%. If it were perfect, I would be kind of worried.

The first half of Monday/yesterday was a blur; I hadn't been able to get very much sleep Sunday night (partially due to the late Sunday, partially due to my worrisome brain meats), so I wandered through a majority of the day zombiesque. After work I trekked to Ossining, to nap in my car and then surprise Chris for his birthday. The plan? Run into him while he was jogging. The problem? He went easy on me when we did the jog together a few weeks ago, and cut it short. So his actual route was not what I had thought. So instead of running into him, I had to run after him. Just in case he turned a corner and I lost him and my plan was entirely ruined. So when he finally turned around to head back, he "ran into" a panting, dying Linda. But he seemed genuinely happy to see me, and that makes all the difference. We talked a little about Jared's wedding reception and Sean & Erin's return to NY for the event and maybe going up to Albany to hang with them and catching Wall-E in a group. I'd like that, and I think he would too, so I hope it pans out. We had an awesome lazy evening and I came back to Long Island this morning.

That about catches me up. Today can be covered tonight, as nothing as really happened as of yet. Sadly, though, I don't have any pictures from yesterday. Boo. Ah, it's only one day, though. Plenty of time to start anew on the one-a-day resolution, yeah?

I take the bike out, it rains: the story of my life.

No, really. I opted not to ride my bike from the south campus parking lot because the forecast predicted rain...and lots of it. ::shakes fist at Owen:: I got to school with enough time to study before my test, which as noted yesterday I was determined to do well on despite my odds (see that's ironic because the test was on statistics. okay, so maybe it's not the same as probability). Anyway, when I get there, the sun is out, so I figure I'll drive halfway on campus and walk a bit. I toted the umbrella just in case.

So I take my test, which isn't so bad. The breakfast burrito (read: mistake) I had for breakfast decided mid-test to fuck me up, though. So what if I got two of the three bonus questions wrong because I didn't have time to read them? Heh. I dashed to a secret place that I'm not afraid of using the bathroom in an emergency and then, having still another 40 minutes worth of break, and with a sky of sunshine, I got out the bike. I rode for about 25 minutes before returning to class. And as I did so, the rain began.
And so did our extended break! Because Sue wanted to get our tests graded, we got an extra 30 minutes (my sympathies to Ryan who had to sit and grade with her). Despite the rain, I went back out. And lo and behold: the rain was gone. This time, though, I had a destination. I'm in love with the speed tracker sign, because it measures my speed on a bike. Problem is, it's atop a slight incline, so my unskilled ass can't usually get it to read anything over 8 or 9. (My first picture is clearer, but it's of an 8. I went back, prepped and made 11.) It's quite difficult when cars screw it all up.
Aaaand at that point guess what happened. Yep, rain. Again. But I was just happy to get my picture. Next time, I'll get a 12. (I'm so laaaame!)

As you might be able to tell, my day wasn't very interesting. I took that test and got the highest score in the class. I rode my bike back to my car (at which point it started raining, mind you). I went shopping (for my dad, brother, and I got me two items of clothing as well). Have I mentioned yet that I hate shopping? I came home and got McDonald's for my mom who was having a craving (it cost her a McChicken sandwich, more commonly known as "a dollar"). I fucked around online for apparently a good hour (what the hell do I do on this thing?), napped for a whole hour (a habit I seriously need to reconsider), then fucked around online for a bunch more hours while pretending to write a paper. Okay, that's not entirely true. I submitted one of my papers and started the next, so some progress was made.

This is the single most boring blog I've ever written. I made a new friend, but I'm too tired to even talk about him.

I do want to include this picture, though. I've been meaning to take it for a while now, and after I did, it was no longer fountainesque. They either ran out of water or figured out how to turn it off. I swear this thing had been going for weeks. SUNY Stony Brook ftw!

training, ipod failure and statistics

What do they all have in common, you ask? My day. I spent three hours at work today talking. For three straight hours I tried to explain a majority of what I do in a week to a girl who could easily become office manager were she not an FIT student looking to get into fashion. Devyn, cutest of cute, a mere twenty-ish (and by 'ish' I mean 'or younger') can pick up and do and understand almost anything. She reminds me a lot of me at that age. I remember working at Russel Plastics and asking question after question so I could do my job "right." I was a perfectionist, and I was good. These days, I'm happy just to leave the office.

I haven't been able to get past lesson two of French by podcast (but I can understand Chris when he refers to a direction or says 'girlfriend' now), and as of today it is even more difficult. The error I am currently receiving, even after rebooting, is "FireWire connections are not supported. To transfer songs, connect the USB cable provided. Press Center to dismiss." I must have pressed Center 3 hundred million times to no avail. After a reboot, I get about twelve seconds to decide what I want to listen to. Queen of patience that I am, I opted for good ol' fashioned radio instead.

I'm discovering my own interests what with all the podcasts I've been listening to. I like science, I like health; however, I appear to be bored (or easily distracted) when listening to world relations. I am not happy about this fact. I want to be interested, so I don't see why I can't force myself to be, but it certainly takes extra concentration, which I don't often have.

Statistics. Oh annoying research-oriented pathetic statistics. I am so very banking on being able to drop tomorrow's test. But I did study my heart out for two hours and I will certainly cram for another hour prior to the exam. I just... I mean... ok, ready? Between-subject designs with more than two levels of the independent variable or more than one independent variable use independent ANOVAs for their inferential statistics. I have no idea what that means, but that is only one example of what I need to know. Within-subject designs with one independent variable having two levels gets a paired t-test. I'm not even sure that's right, I'm just hoping it is.

So speaking of stats and research and my class, here is my daily photo as it describes what's been most on my mind as well as agenda:

Looks like fun, yeah?

Take 2

Well, then. After rashly deleting my initial blog I have decided I'd rather continue with the picture-a-day...until, of course, I skip too many days for me to feel like I've been able to maintain my new attempt at blogging. I'll decide what to do with everything I'd created if and when that time comes to pass.

Today was not as bad an emotional day. I got a little glum over the Results paper I have to write for my Research & Writing class, but I stayed tough. I did a lot of work tonight on it, but have little to show save for a shaky table, but progress is progress nonetheless.

Mike told me I overreacted over something earlier, and he was right, but I angrily chose to disengage myself from the conversation instead of dealing with it. I imagine I should apologize. Perhaps I will do that following this post.

I took two pictures today, of two of the biggest things in my life (during the week anyway, as Chris battles with school for the top slot): school and work. Rather than choose between the two, I thought I would just post both.

This is the Javits Lecture Center at school. It's an awkwardly designed building, diamond in shape with confusing corridors leading to all 10 or so classrooms it contains. The array of flora is new to the recently renovated building and it has certainly come a long way since my first days at SBU. My only gripe with it is the heightened level of air conditioning blasting throughout unnecessarily. Bring a sweatshirt or suffer the consequences!

Secondly, this is Taylor. She is the daughter of the owner of the practice I work for. She's a sweetheart, but a spoiled one (what only child isn't?). She's just another north shore east coast Long Island girl in the making though -- her manicure/pedicure was the news of the day, in not her favorite color, purple, but pink-to match her outfit. Still, the girl is adorable:

I wrote a letter for work today that was "perfect" on the first draft. I think it was the first time ever something I had produced was not requested to be modified. I thank the law firm for that. As well as my NYT crossword subscription. I keep meaning to tell Barbara I still use it. I will try to do so this weekend when I drop by to give her some things.

In other news, I'm happy for Jo, who got herself a new job today, even if it is in the Bronx. So long as she's happier there, I've no beef with who her employer is.

I truly wish I didn't generalize my own actions as part of a greater picture all the time. There's something to be said for progress with oneself, but I have a difficult time determining when it's okay to "screw up." Obviously, no one is perfect, and things can't always run smoothly. But how often is too often? How much is too much? How long is too long? I imagine I will have a difficult time sleeping this evening. I am not a fan of doing things in complicated ways, but it appears without utmost constraint, sometimes it is impossible for me not to. I fear the consequences of my own actions, and although I will try to keep myself calm in their respect, there will likely always be a part of me that "worries." I will summon my positive thinking and try to hold it near. I feel like I may have gone from uber-negative to uber-positive and have now landed somewhere in the middle. I'd like to find out how to get back to uber-positive, because everything went quite well and I felt the happiest when it was the reining mindset. It must be possible if I was there once. Right?